My neighbor has two dogs.

 One of them says to the other,

"Woof!" The other replies, "Moo!"

 The dog is perplexed. "Moo? Why did you say, "Moo'?"

 The other dog says, "I'm trying to learn a foreign language."

Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes.

There are three faithful friends--an old wife, an old dog and ready money.

The other day I saw two dogs walk over to a parking meter. One of them says to the other, "How do you like that? Pay toilets!"

They say the dog is man's best friend.

I don't believe that. How many of

your friends have you neutered?